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Electing God


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#1 TheBigDog

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Posted 02 August 2008 - 10:01 AM

I have been inspired by some of the recent theological debates and came to the conclusion that since there is a gap between science and faith in understanding the nature of God, that we would use the power of democracy to choose a God and then let the chosen deity settle our arguments once and for all.

If you are interested in running for the position of God then post your platform here. Once we have a number of candidates I will open a poll and we will have the election. The winner gets to make the final determination of all the mysteries surrounding the nature and abilities of God. I plan on running myself, since I already claim divinity, but I am going to take some time to prepare a formal platform.

If you have questions for the candidates you can ask them here as well. The election will be in one month; September 2nd. I look forward to seeing how each of you might approach the power and responsibility of being all powerful.

Have fun!

Bill
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#2 Moontanman

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Posted 02 August 2008 - 11:47 AM

Hey kids, vote for me and I'll set you free!

#1 I'll repeal the speed of light speed limit!
#2 I'll change the laws of physics to make the Star Trek Universe Real!
#3 No one need want for anything, replicators will provide for everyone! Every person who votes for me will get his own planet and a Star Ship runabout to get there!:)
#4 Immortality for everyone :confused:
Once I'm in power I'll make good on my campaign platform then leave everyone alone and not bother you again unless you need me to kick the Borgs *** or put a leash on Q or something like that:)
#5 I'll make ringworlds possible and build one for the earth and take a snap shot of the Earth every million years from 600,000,000 years ago and make on million mile section of the Ringworld identical to that time period!
#6 I'll build another universe and let humanity have a say in how it operates!
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#3 Donk

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Posted 02 August 2008 - 04:24 PM

If elected, I will make the following statement:

I resign. From here on, you're on your own. Anything that goes wrong is your fault - don't blame Me for it. Likewise, anything that goes right, you can take the credit.

I made you in My image, so start acting like it! Get off your knees and stop begging for handouts. Stand tall, be smart and stop screwing up My planet!
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#4 Moontanman

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Posted 03 August 2008 - 04:05 PM

If elected, I will make the following statement:

I resign. From here on, you're on your own. Anything that goes wrong is your fault - don't blame Me for it. Likewise, anything that goes right, you can take the credit.

I made you in My image, so start acting like it! Get off your knees and stop begging for handouts. Stand tall, be smart and stop screwing up My planet!


Hey donk, don't you think you should at least clean up the mess being left behind by God's resignation? I plan to leave things much better than they were when I am elected!

#5 Donk

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Posted 03 August 2008 - 06:29 PM

Hey donk, don't you think you should at least clean up the mess being left behind by God's resignation? I plan to leave things much better than they were when I am elected!

Was it Me who made the mess?

I passed the whole thing over to Adam and his kin, putting in a few checks and balances to stop it getting out of hand. I thought what I did to everyone except Noah way back would have taught people how to behave. Then I just turn my back for a few millennia, and what do I find? My beautiful top predators turned into rugs, and six billion uninvited gatecrashers at the party! :eek2:

#6 Thunderbird

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 07:36 AM

I am Thunderbird, keeper of all records of life on this planet, Lord of the earth, , elect me as god and I will connect mankind with the galactic internet.
I will connect the world wide web to all civilizations in the galaxy.
Instant real time access to the vast compendium of knowledge encompassing the history, medicine, technology, art music, literature, of 60,089 present members of the galactic web, along with a complete video history of earths past downloaded directly from my memory system.

#7 Moontanman

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 07:49 AM

Vote for me, I'll do much more for you than Donk or T-bird, everyone will be young healthy and immortal, everyone will have their own living planet to do with as they please. Replicators will provide any and all things that people need or want. No more speed of light limits, invincible star ships for everyone. Ring worlds built to specs. As a matter of fact anyone who wants a ring world instead of a planet will get one! I'll bring back every human who has ever lived and your pets! all extinct animals will be brought back in healthy ecosystems on the ring worlds. Humans will rule the Universe! Physic powers for everyone! Telekinesis, teleportation, send and receive messages mind to mind. Vote for me, I'll set you free!

#8 Moontanman

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 07:54 AM

I'll make unlimited Zero Point energy available and usable for any and all applications. No more energy crisis no matter how much you use.

Vote for me, I'll set you free!

#9 freeztar

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 09:39 AM

God you can believe in!


I know you humans are sick of the same ole god politics. I offer a change from these old ways.

Vote for me and you will get a free ticket into heaven. Immortality will be yours. Every person will gain all the super-abilities imaginable, plus some others that I can't describe. All the knowledge of the universe will be yours. I also vow to put an end to spam!

Vote for change! Vote for a God you can believe in!

#10 Moontanman

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 09:50 AM

God you can believe in!


I know you humans are sick of the same ole god politics. I offer a change from these old ways.

Vote for me and you will get a free ticket into heaven. Immortality will be yours. Every person will gain all the super-abilities imaginable, plus some others that I can't describe. All the knowledge of the universe will be yours. I also vow to put an end to spam!

Vote for change! Vote for a God you can believe in!


:shrug: Hah! I've already made those promises, with replicators being given out to everyone for free. No one will ever want for anything! Your own planet or Ring World, star ships, teleportation, free unlimited energy, youth, health, and immortality. The universe will be your oyster! Plus physic power.

Vote for me, I'll set you free!

#11 freeztar

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 10:08 AM

:shrug: Hah! I've already made those promises


Nobody's fooled. You are making promises that you can not deliver on. This is the same ole politics as usual. We all know that there are not enough habitable planets to give one to each human. Plus, don't you think they would get lonely.

If I am elected, I will humanely solve the Earth's population problem. There's no reason for humans to have to leave this beautiful planet. I will end global warming and make sure the sun does not increase output or burn out. As a bonus, all those that vote for me will receive new iPhones!


Vote for me! God you can believe in!

#12 Moontanman

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 01:01 PM

Nobody's fooled. You are making promises that you can not deliver on. This is the same ole politics as usual. We all know that there are not enough habitable planets to give one to each human. Plus, don't you think they would get lonely.

If I am elected, I will humanely solve the Earth's population problem. There's no reason for humans to have to leave this beautiful planet. I will end global warming and make sure the sun does not increase output or burn out. As a bonus, all those that vote for me will receive new iPhones!


Vote for me! God you can believe in!


Don't listen to freeztar, he wants to be a bush league god, I will take full advantage of my office. god is all powerful, I will make as many planets ring worlds and stars as necessary to full fill my campaign promises!For those who want I will even make exact duplicates of the Earth/solar system! As the Omnipotent all powerful God there would be nothing I cannot do for humanity! Remember, all the people who ever lived will come back under my administration!

VOTE FOR ME, I'LL SET YOU FREE!

#13 Tormod

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 03:17 PM

Vote for me and I will delete any users you dislike. :shrug:

#14 Moontanman

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 03:35 PM

Vote for me and I will delete any users you dislike. ;)


Vote for me for me and I'll give you a world, Tomod just wants to continue the old displease god and get deleted game! I will not harm anyone, cure all madness, a planet in everyones own solar system!

VOTE FOR ME AND I'LL SET YOU FREE!

:shrug:

#15 freeztar

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 03:38 PM

More changes from my eminent rule:

-All churches will be converted to schools.
-Religions will cease to exist and no one need prey again.
-All governments will cease to exist as well. I'll take care of everything.
-Human judges will not be needed. I will set up a council of angels that will hear every conflict and resolve it with divine wisdom.
-All weapons will cease to exist.
-I will introduce the "design a mate" system that will allow you to create your perfect mate right on your computer!
-You will be able to wish for whatever you want. The Angelic Council will decide whether to grant wishes or not on a case-by-case basis.
-Any modifications to your physique that you wish will be honored, within reason.
-Anyone acting like a troll will be forced to live under a bridge for a year.
-Space tourism will become a reality and you will be allowed to warp to wherever you want.
-If I win, I'll reveal whether O.J. Simpson did it or not.

God you can believe in!

#16 Overdog

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 05:19 PM

Vote for me, and I will do everything all my opponents promise, plus all the other things they they haven't thought of yet!!!!!

But be assured, If you do not vote for me, you'll burn in hell for all eternity whether I'm elected or not.:naughty:

#17 Moontanman

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Posted 04 August 2008 - 05:23 PM

Vote for me, and I will do everything all my opponents promise, plus all the other things they they haven't thought of yet!!!!!

But be assured, If you do not vote for me, you'll burn in hell for all eternity whether I'm elected or not.:naughty:


Vote for me and there will no hell and I'll make sure there is no devil or overdog!

VOTE FOR ME AND I'LL SET YOU FREE!