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Male and Female


HydrogenBond

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Men and woman differ not not just physically but also with respect to underlying motivation. This differences within motivation are connected to sexuality. A female's instinctive sexuality is centered on the need for security, i.e., secure nest. Which makes good instinctive sense due to the vulnerability during pregnacy and due to the needs required to care for vulnerable children. The monthly cycle of a woman cyclically changes her hormone balances alterring her moods at various times of the cycle, with all centered on the fear or the instinctive anxiety tone. This underlying anxiety tone is reflected in a women's drive toward conformity and perfectionism. By being perfect or by conforming to the social and personal expectations of law and tradition, a female is able to maximize her appeasement of anxiety.

 

A male's also have a hormonal cycle which is due to the daily production of sperm. This causes the underlying instinctive tone of a male to be centered on desire. This makes men less likely to pursue perfection since desire always adds an irrational impulse toward additional possibilities for the future. It also makes men less able to conform to law due to desire creating the need for alternatives beyond law and tradition. This helps culture from stagnating.

 

In intimate relationships, men seek women to forfill they desire and women seek men to appease their anxiety. In a natural relationship the male will conform to the needs of a woman's instinctive anxiety, while a woman will conform to the needs of a males instinctive desire. This satisfies the potential in each, therey lowering the irrational potentials for a more conscious and happier relationship.

 

Very few human's are natural instinctive. The anxiety of females is influenced by cultural anxiety, while masculine desire is influenced by cultural desire. This is where the battle of the sexes begins. Each attempts to manipulate the other to appease the cultural anxieties and desires that are no longer entirely natural, thereby setting up a resistance in each. This battle occurs via the masculine side of a woman and via the female side of a man. The masculine side of the woman becomes domineering like a primative male, while the female side of the man becomes moody like a primative female. In an ideal situation the natural female side of a woman will teach the male's female side how to be more natural, ie., real time emotions and sensitivity. While the natural masculine side of the male will teach the masculine side of the female how to be more natural, i.e., logical and rational.

 

If culture gets shifted too far either masculine or feminine, either the males or the females will lose their instinctive counterbalance to their spouses. In a purely masculine culture, the males will help the women become rational but the male dominance will cause the males will lose the natural feminine influence on their female sides. This makes the male's desire become tainted with irrational emotion. One can see this is the mideastern cultures, where the females are quite steady and reasonable yet the men are irrational with anger, rage and utopian visions. This irrational emotions within the men can wear on the women causing many females to lose they natural emotions to appease the irrational emotions of the men.

 

On the other hand, in a purely feminine culture the females will help the men get in touch with their sensitivity, but the women will also lose the natural masculine influence on their masculines sides because of the female dominance. This keeps the females full of irrational anxiety. The irrational anxiety of the females can wear on the men causing them to sacrifice their reason to appease irrational female anxiety. If thid becomes cultural wide, cultural will lose its ability to think long term, but will do what is need for some temporary peace and quiet. This bandade needs to be replaced often because it does not address the real problems.

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The basis for the post is common sense and data that anyone can gather. The dynamics of intimate male-female relationships are very uniform only the details change. The comedian Rodney Dangerfield sort of summed it up, " All he and his wife argue about is sex and money, she charges too much". It amounts to masculine desire and female's need for security being behind male and female motivation. Women prefer love to sex because love provides longer term security than sex. Loving security leads to sex. Early in a relationship a man is happy with just sex but grows to love.

 

As far a men having a female side and women having a masculine side, at conception we are all composed of male and female DNA, the majority defines the sex. The minority is not inert but has an impact on our cross genger personality. These components are most obvious later in life when strong men soften and soft woman become more dominant.

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Tiamut & Marduk, Chaos & Law, Yin & Yang, Anima & Animus, Venus & Mars – for something approaching 4,000 years, the major dichotomies of existence have tended to be expressed in terms of female / male interaction. HydrogenBond, your writing is part of a long tradition, which I hope proves personally rewarding to you.

 

Like so much of Philosophy, Science (Biology), has mostly failed to provide compelling evidence of the objective reality of female/male differences, but rather has tended to blur the distinctions between the genders. Ovaries secret testosterone, and the livers of both men and women secret estrogen. Anatomical brain differences between men and women prove increasingly subtle and inconclusive.

 

My personal experiences have led me to conclude, anecdotally, not scientifically, that the great social dynamic is not between men and women, but between the haves and the have-nots, the rich and the poor.

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I believe that the only polarization that is natural on earth is between men and women. Cultural polarization is unnatural because it separates us from each other. With the natural polarization associated with male and female they can hate and love at the same time, differntiating distinction yet remaining friends. Modern culture has tried to make the natural polarization homogeneous making it harder to see the differences. These differences are easiest to see early in life and then blur with time. Girls tend to learn law quicker due to their better memories this provides more security. Boys forget or will consciously forget to remember thereby allowing them to follow their impluses easier putting themselves more in jeapardy. In early mutual relationships, girls are often ready to settle before the boys, while the boys are more afraid to settle because their nature has desire impulse.

 

The saying, my better half, shows men and women each being halfs of the whole that bring out the best and worst in each other. One sex is not better or worse than the other but rather each are specialized members of the same team, where the two working together are stronger than the two parts working alone. Men learn how to develop their females side through women and women learn how to develop their male sides through men. This development process is not just for the good but also for the bad, thereby allowing males and females to experince the dynamics range of their personality. Eventually, men and woman become increasingly homogeneous but subtle differences will still exist.

 

A simple experiment that woud make the subtle difference obvious would be to allow the men and women within an intimate relationship to alternate months of complete relationship authority. The relationship would slant toward the needs of each and would reveal male and female distinctions.

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Much of my understanding comes from the psychologist Carl Jung and my own collection of data stemming from relationships with women of different personality types, i.e., extroverted, introverted, submissive, dominant, intellectual, impulsive,etc.. What Jung teaches and what I have observed is that the human personality has three layers. The highest level is male in a man and is the symbolized by the spirit of truth. The highest level within a female is is female and is symbolized by mother earth. At this level the male principle is active and the female is responsive. During a natural disaster, where procedures are not fixed but rather one needs to improvise without preceident, the male will has an advantage and the female will react to his spatial intutitions. The female intuitively seems to know how to accommodate change within the context of her natural instincts. This is the tree of life.

 

The second level is usually associated with culture, law, procedures and romatic relationship. In this case the female's masculine side is the active principle and the male's female side is responsive. That is why the wife during day to day life is often in charge and the male reacts to his wife's moods and social demands. At this level the feeling tone is centerred on fear within the female and on desire within the male. This is the tree of knowledge.

 

The third level is connected to the shadow side. Here the male is male and the female is female. This shadow side is half human and animal. It is the basis for our instinctive potentials and their effect on the human personality. At this level, the male is the active principle and the female reactive. Between human and animal behavior are beastial behavior. Law and the tree of knowledge helped humanity to evolve beyond this lower level into the realm of the middle level. The net stage of evolution will allow us to be more conscious at the highest level.

 

Much of my data collection was based on the assumption that five minutes with a toothache will tell one more that five hour observing others with toothaches or fifity hours having others explain what they remember about a toothache. Too much, psychology data is second hand data subject to the subjectivity of the researcher. The human personality should not be a dozen theories but should more uniform like the rest of the body.

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Men and woman differ not not just physically but also with respect to underlying motivation. This differences within motivation are connected to sexuality.

A triumph of ignorance over empirical reality. An info-mercial.

 

If during a game of pickup football you smash a confrer's face into the mud, you will later go out together for a beer. If during a business meeting you demonstrate a woman's error, she will loathe you forever with infinite revenge. Men respect rank, women exercise perfidy. That is the difference between men and women. Sex is something different - men need a place, women need a reason.

 

Much of my understanding comes from the psychologist Carl Jung

Look at van Gogh's paintings. van Gogh was crazy and talented. Look at Carl Jung's paintings. Jung was crazy and self-serving.

 

Try reading Leopold von Sacher-Masoch. You will still be ridiculous but at least you won't be boring.

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